True Friendship

Is a mixture of acceptance, understanding and willingness to just be there.

It is a matter of not judging, and not letting your own social views override your ability to listen.

Like being in a relationship, maintaing a close friendship needs some form of balance. I really don't think that you can ever split any relationship into equal parts... just like a couple living together cannot every be able to do an equal amount of housework, it really is not possible for friends to split "responsibilities" into equal parts. So, again, things work out only when there is a little of "give and take", and when you accept each other's strengths and weaknesses.

Think it's again a case of things sounding easier than it seems. Would like to think that I have realized the importance of friendship in the past couple of years, and that I've tried to be that "true friend" to a select group of people who are important to me.

A little thing happened yesterday that unsettled me... not a very big issue, but yes, it unsettled me nonetheless. So I made a phone call, and I guess the response I got at the other end prompted this blog. Think that for some reason or other, have always been someone who laughs more than I cry. Yes, when things crop up, I do my fair share of whining, bitching, etc... but I guess I try not to break down. Somehow, somewhere, someone once taught me that to show all emotions was a sign of weakness... maybe now I may know better, but somethings just don't change.

Think I've pretty much admitted to myself and to a few others that I've lived a pretty messed up life from 16 to 23??? And the past three years at least has been this process of me trying very much to pick up these little pieces and putting them back together. I don't think that I've actually every tried talking to anyone about those few years... yes, factually I have... but never really about how I FELT about those years. Looking back, I am oft amazed that I'm still here...

There are a few people out there whom I thought understood. That there is no need for me to cry, to "drown my sorrows", to literally break down, for them to realize that things matter to me. And that though I can smile... it's really rather superfical. Guess I just realized that that may not be the case, and at the end of the day, a person is judged by his or her reactions.

Amazing... when you look around you, there are those who have really "felt", and then there are those whereby emotions are only skin deep. And funnily enough, understanding comes in the most unexpected ways. Would like to thank a really special friend whom I have known for the past 9 /10 years... Gal, can still remember when I first told you all... at Canteen B and the stunned look on your face. Think till this day, alot of what I said and what you witnessed thereafter is incomprehensible to you... but still you tried to just be there... think there were many a time in the past couple of years when you told me that you may not understand, and that my actions were not something that you would have done, but you will be there anyways... Yup, think I really really do appreciate your ability to just be there for me regardless of, and that you always accept who I am...