Depression

Depression

Is like a figure lurking in the shadows
At times it creeps quietly up
At times it hurls itself at you
However the attack, often we are caught unawares
Unprepared in the face of it
A person's baser instinct unfolds

Often felt that it's how a person copes with the problems in life that tells much of a person. Often we may appear capable, calm... but how really does one react when one is alone and away from the public glare? In the past month, have seen a lot of my colleagues struggle with the growing number of resignations. On the surface, everyone appears to be taking things in their stride, but on closer interactions, you sense that morale is at a all time low.

Mayhaps my boss is right about me after all... and that I am too much of a people person, and too affected by the moods of others. Have been struggling to be bouyant in office and assuring everyone that I'll try and handover things properly. However, truth is, I do feel rather helpless... there's just so much that is out of my control. A concerned colleague read the blog post yesterday and asked if I was very bitter about my experience here. Answer frankly is no... but I just find that it's a waste... as I think we have admirable goals here, and we do attract a rather talented workforce... however, guess you need to practice all those things that you learnt in Management 101 in order to retain the workfocre. It's a pity when everyone around you is working on a day to day basis... it just drains out whatever passion there is in you. I maintain that only the most disciplined of people can attain a high standard of work here, and I've learnt that I just don't have what it takes.

I suspect that there are only one or two individuals who roughly know how I handle the little problems in my life... or also, how I tend to sink myself into problematic situations... this sight is never pretty, which is why it should always be meant only to be shown in the privacy of my room. :)