Time

A precious commodity that we often don't emphasize enough.

Past year has been eventful indeed. Multiple visits to the doctors and a real health scare. One would expect that given the circumstances I would re-assess certain portions of my life.

And actually, I have.

This page has really been the avenue of the bulk of my angst, my displeasure and then again, my greatest joys. So it's maybe reading my past posts, that I remember how uptight I used to feel at work. It's amazing really, that super tense feeling, that need to want to lash out someway or other. Thankfully, that has changed. Although, the greatest source of office angst is now worse than ever, these days, I take it very much in my stride. Bitch about it and move on.

But is there more that I wish I could do with time? Of course. Even on a somewhat idle day where I am just lazing with somewhat special, there's a part of me that wishes I could multi task, run errands, buy that top etc etc. Maybe, I have turned into that machine that I always accuse my boss of - one that is starting to fail to enjoy the process. Be it shopping, reading, it's now about efficiency. Jokes of all jokes, I have now even started power half hour workouts in a bit to be healthier and solve my headaches in an efficient manner.

I long... for a month, not on a holiday. But just to be in here in Singapore. Spending time. Slowly do the housework, hang out at the cafe, read that philosophy book, drink that champagne. Can't explain why - in my mind champagne is really linked to that idyllic lifestyle.

I want to go shop. Slowly. With someone, not alone. To buy that elusive bag. Spend some of that money that I seem to be earning and letting it flow out of hands without even knowing where it is going to. To go buy a gift for someone. Again together.

I dream these days of starting afresh. On the work front - but obligations are a hard thing to shake off. When I turned back a year ago, it was a promise to the team. Do people still keep to promises to colleagues? - I wonder.

But what next? Am doing that counting down thing ... can't be long